Married dating: an honest guide for adults
By Lottie Williams, Head of Content
Updated
People look for something outside their marriage for all sorts of reasons: a sexless relationship, a mismatch in wants, loneliness, or plain curiosity. We will not tell you what to do. We will tell you how to go about it honestly with the people you meet, and what to weigh up first.
Before you start
Be clear with yourself about what you actually want. If it is attention, chemistry and a bit of excitement, casual dating can offer that. If what you really want is to fix your marriage, or to leave it, an affair rarely does either, and often makes both harder.
If you are not sure, talking to someone can help. In the UK, Relate offers relationship counselling to individuals as well as couples, so you can go on your own.
Be upfront with the people you meet
Set your Relationship setup to "Partner doesn't know" and say early in a chat that you are married. Some people will pass, and that is their right. Those who stay know what they are agreeing to, which makes everything easier.
Never pretend to be single. The person you meet has their own life, and possibly their own partner. Lying to them is the one thing here that is entirely in your control.
Married meeting married, or single
Some married people prefer to meet someone in the same position, because they understand the limits: no calls at weekends, no overnight stays, no sudden expectations. Others meet single people who simply want something casual. Either works if you are both clear.
Say what you can offer. "Weekday daytime" or "Weekday evenings" in When are you free? tells people when you are around, and "Hotel / neutral place" under Can you host? is a common, sensible choice.
How it works on No Strings Dating
Your profile has a Relationship setup answer, with "Partner doesn't know" among the options. It only shows on your full profile, never on cards, so people who read you properly know where you stand. "Discreet affair" is one of the things you can say you are up for, and the Discretion answer lets you choose "Discretion appreciated" or "Discretion essential".
Privacy is built in: profiles never appear on public pages or in search engines, any photo but your main one can be private until you share it, payments show under a neutral company name, and you can block anyone you know so they no longer see you.
The line we hold
No Strings Dating is a casual dating site, not an affair site. We do not judge why you are here, and we will not cheer you on either. What we ask is simple: be honest with the person you meet about your situation. They are taking a risk too, and they deserve to choose it knowingly.
Our privacy advice is about protecting your own information. We will never help anyone deceive the person they are meeting, or read, track or monitor anyone else. It is dating, not a marketplace: nobody pays or is paid for company or sex. Every member is over 18 and has passed an age check, and whatever happens, happens in private.
The honest part
Affairs carry real emotional risk: for you, for your partner and for the person you meet. Feelings do not always stay where you put them, and secrets have a way of getting out. Go in with your eyes open, and be kind to everyone involved, yourself included.
Sexual health matters more when someone at home is affected without having a say. Use condoms, and test regularly. In the UK, NHS sexual health clinics are free and confidential, and staff will not tell anyone what you discuss without your permission, including your GP. Our Safety Centre lists free services in every country we serve.
Quick answers
Is married dating allowed on No Strings Dating?
Yes, for adults who are honest about their situation with the people they meet. The site is for casual dating, and some members are married.
Should I tell someone I am married?
Yes, early. Set your Relationship setup to "Partner doesn't know" and mention it in chat, so they can decide for themselves.
Where can I talk to someone about my marriage?
In the UK, Relate offers relationship counselling to individuals as well as couples. A GP can also point you to local support.
Is it better to meet someone else who is married?
Some people prefer it because the limits are understood on both sides. What matters most is that you are both honest about what you can offer.
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